To 2023 and Beyond – Personal Strategies for the New Year

New Year, new thoughts, new goals….not really, but the start of a new year is a symbolic time to reflect and focus on things in our life that we want to continue, stop and new things to take on.  I think we continue mostly in default mode but we need to reevaluate and so we can make room in our lives for the new, for the growth.  Since we only have 24 hours a day, there is a continuous trade off on what to continue, what to stop, and what to start.  A lot of actionable introspection to do combined with discipline. 

I have spent the past two weeks (in addition to work) immersing myself in podcasts that I find inspiring and motivational; somewhat chaotic, but chaos is good. But I also thrive on being a participant not a passive observer/listener, so it’s time for action.

Personal Strategy vs. Tactics

I don’t make New Year’s resolutions, they tend to be very tactical (e.g., workout more, eat healthier, go out more), instead I find it more effective to focus on strategy-where am I going and what do I really want to be.  The tactics (how I will get there) then just align to strategy.  This may sound esoteric but it’s not.  Without a strategy, we just have a bunch of random tactics (actions and activities) that we ultimately give up on as they fall apart because of a lack of cohesiveness.  An example of this, “I don’t feel like working out, it’s boring.” But if we need more energy to enable our personal strategy then we know (this is not a big revelation of this blog), that we need to work out, get over that initial hump and become more energetic.

Typically, personal strategies are related to personal growth.  But again, personal growth is too vague to be actionable. There are many ways to grow, but we have to be true to ourselves.  These strategies have to connect to who we truly are, our values and what makes us happy and gives us peace of mind. For example, if you value authentic relationships over having a large acquaintance group, then be true to yourself, spend time alone until you find authenticity in others. Our society really shames others for being alone. If you sit alone somewhere, you may feel judged and you probably are, but you have to be comfortable with that. No, you are not a reject; you are rejecting superficial relationships.  On the other hand, if you like and need to have a giant social circle, go for it.  “To thyself be true,” Shakespeare. As individualistic as our society is, there really is a shaming with not having a giant social network.  To learn more about this and its health effects, read: “Togetherness” Vivek H. Murthy, MD. Community is important, sense of belonging is important, and it is great for your mental and physical health, but to me it has to be authentic. 

Many struggle with “I don’t know what I don’t know.” So, how can I develop a strategy? I am busy just trying to make a living, sustain what I have, keep my job,  raise my kids, etc.” All valid points, but like with anything, we need to prioritize, if we don’t, it falls by the wayside.  We don’t have issues prioritizing our loved ones but many of us have issues with prioritizing ourselves and prioritizing our non-family relationships. Consider this:

“Meeting a 70,80,90, 100-year old that regrets. That regrets that they didn’t have more fun, that they didn’t spend more time with their family, that’s the cliche one, but you’d be surprised how many people regret not doing more things for themselves.”

Gary Vaynerchuk

That “doing for themselves” for me means personal growth and ensuring that your personal identity doesn’t fall by the wayside or if it did, get it back.  This is not selfish. And sometimes doing for yourself is doing for others-true kindness.  But that’s another blog for another day.

So what does this all mean for 2023? Make your introspection actionable…..we know ourselves, we know our strengths and weaknesses. We know where we lack discipline, where we need to improve, what our biggest time wasters are; we know what fuels us and what makes us sad or isolated.

As I start the year, I am going to continue to lean more into discomfort (tactics) so that I can make progress on the strategies that I have not made any progress on in the past year. I have a multitude of strategies with different aspects of growth that are actionable.  My biggest flaw is that it is all in my head and often don’t follow through. I know myself very well, and I know this.

And while writing this blog, I have also resolved to turn off the ‘likes’ on my Instagram:

“Can’t wait for Instagram to get rid of likes. Hoping it leads to the elimination of public vanity metrics. Really believe it will lead to an explosion of creativity and truth.”

Gary Vaynerchuk

(yes, a bit overdosed on his podcasts, but while some of them are all over the place…I too thrive on chaos).

I don’t partake in contests of any sort and the lnstagram likes are sort of a popularity contest; homecoming queen of social media is not what fuels me.

That “doing for themselves” for me means personal growth and ensuring that your personal identity doesn’t fall by the wayside or if it did, get it back.  This is not selfish. And sometimes doing for yourself is doing for others-true kindness.  But that’s another blog for another day.

So be true to yourself and if you are not sure what that is due to day to day obligations, spend some time to figure it out; it is not selfish.